I just dont know anymore. I dont know what I want. I want to be with some one but at the same time I dont think I should look to be with some one tell I am happy by myself. Dont you think you should be self Happy first? I dont know. I thought maybe it was because I have lost my touch with god and all that stuff... I have not really been active since the booted my youth director and I probably just need to find a new church to fo to. Maybe that will make me happy. Maybe I just need god back in my life. I just feel empty at the moment. I mean this goes of and on like most people but still it is just not right.... I also likening people I can never have... I dont know why I mean they are girls I know and stuff but I know it would never ever work out between us because of the pasts I have with these girls. I also have gave up on looking for a type. Everyone has their type. There dream person. I have given up on that completely. I am just looking and only really paying attention when the first thing that comes to my mind is Wow she is gorgeous. I see girls that look good a lot but they dont all hit me like damn and you mind just stops thinking about everything. I dont just judge on looks so dont say that but I want to be attracted to the girl lol.... I just dont think I should look at the same time because I dont have money to do anything and I get in these moods which I dont want to make people deal with.... I even feel bad for you people who are reading this thing... I just dont know :-( .... sorry about always complaining in here peeps just seems to be my thing.....